Waiting in Expectation

We have been in a terrible drought this summer.  It has only rained twice since the kids got out of school.   I wanted the kids to understand our need for rain and how much we truly rely on God.  So we went for an early morning walk.  I took the kids out by the barn to show them how the ground is cracking and the withered grass is disappearing quickly.
   Then we walked over to our nice green garden and looked at all of the vegetables growing and the lush grass growing around the garden's perimeter and compared the two.  The kids did not understand why we did not water all of our land the way we watered our garden.  So we had a short lesson on water supply and the importance of water conservation.
  Their conclusion; we need to pray for rain and we need to do it right now.  Kinley suggested going to get Mimi to pray with us.  I love the fact that Kinley knows she has a mighty prayer warrior next door who is willing to pray with us at any moment.  Of course, she was and she dropped what she was doing simply saying "where two or more are gathered..."
   We circled up holding hands in Mimi's living room and pleaded with God for rain.  Well, I pleaded for rain.  Here was Caden's prayer.
Dear God,
  Thank you for our food.  Thank you for the rain.  Thank you for our family.  Thank you watering our grass.  Thank you for Jesus.
Amen
    I was struck by the fact that he thanked God for the rain as if it had already happened.  That simple child like faith.   So many times I get caught up in the wordings of my own prayers.  As if I string the words together in a secret churchy, holy-sounding formula, I will be heard. Or often I beat around the bush with God in my prayers, afraid to be too bold in asking what I truly want .  Or sometimes my prayers may sound more like a grocery list of all the things I am needing that day.  Caden's prayer reminded me that I need to share more of my thanksgivings and less of what I think I need. That is one of the reasons why I love to hear my children pray, they are always teaching me.
   For the rest of the day, my children waited in expectation.  Waiting for God to answer that prayer.  Sure that God was answering that prayer. After lunch, I asked them if they wanted to go swimming.  Their reply "Mom, it is about to rain.  Are you sure we should go swimming?  We would rather wait and play in the rain."
  I did not have the heart to tell them that the skies were sunny blue and that the weather man said there was less than a 20% chance of rain.  So we played a game inside instead.  All day they kept going outside, looking to the sky, waiting for an answer.  Reminded me of another day, of watching my kids wait for rain.

    Finally, at bedtime, Kinley says to me " Mom, I can't believe it did not rain all day today. Let's pray about it again tonight. " And again she shared a sweet prayer to God about providing the rain we needed so badly.  I reassured her that we could try again tomorrow and that sometimes we have to wait on God for His timing. 

  Just after midnight, I nearly jumped out of bed as we had three very excited children run into our room calling:

"It's raining!  God answered our prayer!"

   And He answered it in a big way. The wind was howling, it was thundering and lightening something awful and we could hear the down pour of rain hitting our tin roof.  It was the loudest storm, we have had all year.  God was showing us his faithfulness one more time.  We were blessed with over an inch of rain that night.  Needless to say, it took us awhile to get the kids to go back to sleep that night because of they were excited.

   And honestly they should be.  They just learned an important lesson.. I am heard.  We all are.  We are heard and loved by a God, bigger and greater than anything in this world.  And He is just waiting to bless us.  Just as the kids were looking to the sky that day, looking for an answer, waiting in expectation.  He is waiting to hear from us. Waiting to bless us. He is waiting in expectation.

  

Eyes of Jesus

So today was an eye opening experience.  Rob has befriended a sixteen year old boy that goes to Anderson High School.  His story will break your heart.  He has a cleft pallet, a pace maker, and a mother with severe diabetes.  His mother has already had a leg amputated and is on dialysis three times a week.  They are not sure how long she will make it in this condition.  All of this combined with a speech impediment has caused this teen to be extremely shy. This family is barely surviving on her disability check.  Rob just helped them to get running water in their trailer.
  Some people at church gathered clothes for this sweet young man.  Since the kids have heard their daddy talk about his new friend, they wanted to go with him to deliver the clothes. We thought this would be  a good opportunity for them to see how blessed we truly are and to see us in service to others.  On our way, I was praying about the kids reaction to this family's living conditions. They are the age that they say whatever comes to mind- good or bad. I struggled with the idea of telling them what to say (or what not to say) but decided to just go with it and hope for the best.  I have found the more I intervene the less I rely on the Spirit.
  As we got out of the car, we were greeted by 6 chihuahua dogs and we could see a pit bull tied to the trailer.  There were piles of trash everywhere, the trailer has boarded up windows, and the door was wide open.  Inside, the floors were rotting out and the house smelled horrible.  I noticed in one corner of the house the lady had a a few statues of birds and some stuffed animals. Other than that, the house was a complete disaster.
   We visited with the family for a bit.  The mother loved the kids immediately, and seemed to hit it off with Caden.  The kids were very sweet and seemed to enjoy talking with the family.  As we got in the car, Maddie was  thinking of ways to help this family.  She wanted to get them a new house.  You could tell that she was really concerned for their well being.
   Sweet Kinley's only comment.  "I really liked the pretty statues in their living room."
  Not one word about the piles of trash or the horrific smell.  If you know Kinley, you know that she has the nose of a hound dog and gags at the slightest stench. But it was as if she did not even see or smell any of that.  She was focused  on what seemed special to this family.  She only saw the good.  A child like faith.
Immediately I was reminded of this scripture:
  " I tell you the truth," Jesus said "unless you change and become like them little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.  Therefore whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."
  Webster defines Humility or humbleness as the quality of being courteously respectful of others.  The absence of arrogance, boast fullness, and pride. 
  There it was in front of me.  Child like humility pure and simple.  And once again my children ministered to me in a way no one else could, loving people for who they are and seeing them through the eyes of Jesus. 
  

My Inheritance

Children are an inheritance from the LORD. They are a reward from him.  Psalms 127:3

    God put it on my heart to lead a bible study this summer. So I bit the bullet and  emailed a few of my close friends wanting to start a study through Good Morning Girls.  All  five of my friends were feeling the same need to dig deep into God's word , so we committed to start the next week, within days we had a group of 18 ladies!  It has been awesome to see how God has orchestrated our group. This study uses daily scripture reading combined with Sally Clarkson's book The Ministry of Motherhood. 

    One of our first scriptures of study was Psalms 127:3.  I love this verse, I have heard it many times, I have it plastered in my children's scrapbooks and committed it to memory for difficult days as a mommy.  However, this time the word inheritance really jumped out at me. 
     As you know, last year Rob's granddaddy passed away.  His sweet Mimi planned out what to give each child or grandchild to remember this great man.  Rob's Uncle Terry, an avid sports fan, got his high school letter jacket.  Rob's other uncle, a writer, received Granddaddy's writing desk.  Rob's bother, who has a large collection of watches, was given his watch.  Each gift fit the receipt perfectly and represented a part of their own character, interest, or personality.
   I could not help but picture God picking out the perfect inheritance for me and Rob.  Knowing that our three children each contained personality traits that would bind us together, or spur us on in our own relationship with him. 
   God knew Rob needed someone to share his love of music, so he gave us sweet Maddie.  I love to see the two of them absorbed in a song.  Maybe God picked us as her parents to nurture that love so that she could write praise music for Him. 
   God chose us to enjoy the sweet loving spirit of Kinley.  He knew that we could help guide her big heart to love the way He loves and to protect her gentle spirit from the world. 
  God gave us Caden, to spark our imaginations and fill our home with laughter.  There have been many days that I have been frustrated or tired and yet his contagious laugh has encouraged my spirit. 
   Of course there are many more wonderful qualities that Rob and I like to think come from us!  However, there are also traits that are instilled in them that are unlike our personalities.  I have to remind myself that God made them different for a purpose and try not to reshape them into a mini Rob or Kristi. 
    Or there are times those traits are a little less enduring. Like the day Caden insisted on wearing his monkey costume to school all day last August. (Hence the photo at the top.)  I gave in, let him wear it, he survived and gave people a good laugh for the day. 
    All three of our kids are pretty strong willed and determined but I know God put those traits there too.  With his guidance we can cultivate those qualities to glorify His kingdom. I pray that I will remember this too and not try to reshape them to be the way I want them to be but the way God designed them to be.
     So this is my prayer. 
Lord,
Help me to treasure my gifts, my inheritance.  Help me to not get bogged down in the loads of laundry or the piles of dishes.  Encourage me to focus on my three little blessings from you.  Help us to grow them and nurture them into what you want them to be.  Remind me  in the difficult times that you knit these children in my womb with a plan far greater than my own.  Thank you Lord for choosing me to be their mom. 
In Your name,
Amen

 

Inspiration

I know you are shocked!  I am actually going to attempt to blog again.  We live such busy lives that I've found it hard to write down a recap of all of daily activities. And in all honesty, they were not that exciting.  Lots of fun memories but nothing life transforming.  I think it is neat to use your blog as a digital scrapbook but it has honestly not been motivating enough for me to sit down in front of a computer. So, I am going to try a different approach.  If I am going to take the time to do this, I want it to mean something really special to those taking the time to read it especially my three little munchkins one day.

God has really laid it on my heart to disciple my children.  Not just be the maid, chauffeur, teacher, cook, nurse or whatever role that day. Although those are all important parts of my ministry, I want to take these mundane and ordinary tasks and turn them into teachable moments for spiritual/ character training. I really want to follow Christ example in reaching the hearts of my children.  I want to stretch beyond the ordinary in loving, leading, and training three of my favorite people in this world.  I want my time with them to be meaningful, a time to disciple them to be passionate, devoted servants for Christ. 

So as I am trying to create more purpose in my role as mom.  I taking a new approach in my ministry as mom.  I have been inspired to reach beyond the ordinary.  I thought it might be a good time to pull up the ole' blog and giving it a little transformation too. Hoping it will hold me accountable with my plan of action or help my sweet three musketeers at least know that I tried.....

More to come....

Disco Family

I know it has been way too long since I posted on my blog.  So long that our family has completely changed our look.

Rob grew his hair out.

Maddie is now a blonde.

Kinley wears glasses now.

                                                           And we got a pet disco monkey.

I will try to do better at blogging but it is hard when you live with this crazy bunch...

Granddaddy

Losing Granddaddy was really hard on our family.  We know that he is no longer suffering and is definitely in a better place but we still just miss him.

One of the hardest things for me and Rob is that we want our kids to remember how special he was and how much he adored all of his great grandchildren. So this blog is written to you.  My precious little ones...
Granddaddy was not an old man that you were forced to hang out with at holidays.  He was a huge part of your everyday activities. He taught you so much about the importance of family, giving your best, honesty, and respect. He was your teacher, your cheerleader, your buddy, your favorite neighbor, and your biggest fan. I think the best way to keep his memory alive is to continue to hold tight to the memories made with him.  Here are a few.... 

Maddie

Granddaddy liked to call you Maddie Bug and you loved that nickname.

You liked to sit and watch TV with him.  He would change the channel from the news, to sit and watch cartoons on your behalf.

You were always running next door to show him a project you made in school or reciting him a poem or scripture you had memorized.  He thought you were brilliant and always complimented you on your maturity and knowledge.

He loved your dimples.

He thought you were beautiful and that you looked like a true Billingsley.

You like to share saltine crackers with him out of the big glass jar.

He was there when you were born in The Woodlands. He was at all seven of your birthday parties.  He came to Montgomery to visit you several times and was there for your baby dedication. 

As soon as we found out that Granddaddy was gone.  You went to your room to retrieve your prayer journal. This is what you wrote." Dear God, I know Granddaddy is having a blast. I miss him already. Tell Him that I love him. Tell him that I love his laugh. I love it when he called me Maddie Bug, Tell him that Kinley is really sad and misses him a lot. I miss him a lot. I love him. I love you God. Amen" When I pulled out your journal to copy this, I could not help but look back at your previous entries. For the past two months, there were several entries praying for Granddaddy and Mimi. You did this all on your own.  As we are working on your flower project for spring you have decided  that Granddaddy was like a seed that couldn't wait to get out of his shell. He is blooming in heaven.  I think Granddaddy was right about your wisdom and insight.

Kinley

He loved your bear hugs.  Every time you went over to see him, you made sure to give him one.

He loved your spunk and spirit and was always talking about your great sense of humor.

He would always say...that Kinley when talking about you, even the way he said your name, you could hear the love in his voice.

He thought you were gorgeous and was always talking about the way you would steal the hearts of all the boys in town.

He loved your thoughtfulness and said you had a huge heart like your Granna. 

You liked to take care of Granddaddy and would always use his back scratcher to reach the itchy spots that he couldn't reach.

He gave you a hard time for always being barefoot and changing clothes a thousand times a day.

He liked the way you liked to dress up.  Grandaddy liked to dress up too.

He was also there when you were born.  He was there for your first four birthday parties and was right next door, too ill to visit for your fifth birthday.  He was proud to be at your baby dedication at Highpoint, the church he built. 

You probably had the hardest time with his death.  You keep saying he was the best Granddaddy in the world. You have decided that God must love Granddaddy a bunch, to take him him to heaven on God's favorite day of the week, Sunday.

Caden James

You were named after this great man.  He thought you were so special.  He was thrilled to finally have a boy to carry on the great name Billingsley.

He loved holding you on his lap.
He liked to share his peanuts with you.
You loved going over to share a glass of juice with him each day.
You both liked to eat popcorn.
You liked to sneak over to his house after the girls were in bed to have a little "TV time" with Granddaddy.
He loved to watch you "waller" on the floor in the transformer pillowcase each day.
He anticipated your visits and liked to see which costume you would wear each day.
He always laughed about the fact that you ran around half-dressed or naked everywhere.
Your bedroom is decorated with pictures of him and his football relics.
He once told me that you were an "unexpected gift to the whole family".
You both shared a love for building and that thrilled him to no end.
He was there at your birth, your baby dedication and your first two birthday parties.
On the day he died, we were sitting on the couch and you looked over and said out of the blue, "Granddaddy is with God" and then you added " and "he is happy." An hour later, we found out that you were right and that you said that to me right at the time he went to be with Jesus. You  mention on occasion that Granddaddy is with God and that you want to be with God too.

A Happy family is but an earlier heaven.~ Chinese Proverb

Thank you Granddaddy for giving us just a taste of what you are enjoying now.
We miss you dearly.

Tribute to Granddady

Rob wrote a special tribute to Granddaddy last week before he passed away on Sunday. I thought I would share these precious words with you all.

Granddaddy-


Although most of my good traits come from you, one that I did not inherit was the ability to express myself on paper as eloquently as you. It pains me to see you hurt. I wish I could help you, but I am powerless. My thoughts are random and scattered...Here is a short list of the things that I have inherited from you..love of family, work ethic, the power of story telling and family history, compassion, integrity, the understanding that our wealth is in who we love and not what is in our pocket, our homes are not ours but God's, and are a place of shelter and peace for our families, it is ok to help folks out and not expect any reciprocity, how to be a father, how to be a friend, to do what is right even if it hurts, commitment, faithfulness, forgiveness, it's worth taking extra time to complete a task correctly, love for a relative does not die ever, tenderness, jokes are powerful and healing, how to get up after you have been knocked down. To be honest, the list goes on and on, and will continue to...

My new favorite song is "Head Full of Doubt/Road Full of Promises" It talks of a place where nothing is owed, deserved or expected, and your life doesn't change by the man that's elected and your loved by someone and never rejected.. It talks about a dream that, like a bird is locked in a cage and he longs to free it. I want you here but I want you to be free. I want our doubts to vanish and be replaced by the fullfillment of a promise that was made on a cross 2000 years ago. I'm not in a hurry to see you leave this world, believe me, I can't imagine it without you, but I have been granted peace by our Heavenly Father about what you are facing. I know none of us are guaranteed tomorrow and I'm not at all trying to be dark. This type of thinking gives me peace.

I know we will all recongnize each other in heaven. We have to be able to or it won't be right. In heaven I look foward to seeing you in your youthful state, meeting your Dad, building with the Billingsleys, gardening with the Tabors, getting beat by you in the 100yd, dash. That's what heaven is like I'm sure. I love and respect you deeply. Your worth to me is immeasurable. You stood in the gap when I needed it and showed me a father's love.

Rob

A whole Hand

Kinley turned 5 years old this month!  I can't believe she is a whole hand!  We had a cupcake birthday party for her and I'll give more details on that later but first I want to focus on some of the things you are doing these days.
1) You are the Cartwheel Queen.  You are forever doing cartwheels and handstands.  You have just about perfected both.
2) You love clothes.  You change clothes about ten times a day, always coming up with a unique ensemble.
3) Your closest buddies are Abbie, your cousin and Emma, a little girl that will be in your kinder class next year.  Although you and Maddie have started a "Sister Sister club" and you can Cade are best buddies.
4) You are into drawing lately and you have really gotten good at it.
5) You adore your family and spending time with them.  You will do anything to have quality time with anyone that you love.
6) You are a little obsessed with washing your hands especially around your baby cousins.
7) I love how you say willn't instead of won't.
8) Your room is always messy which drives your sister crazy!
9) You love to hang out on "the tramp" with your brother and sister.
10) Your favorite drink is chocolate milk.
11)  You have created a secret sign that you and I flash to each other in private.  Don't worry I'll never tell. :)
12)  You are one of the sweetest most tenderhearted people that I know.  You are always feeling for others and I can't wait to see how God uses your heart of gold for His glory.
I love you Kin-Kin!

I love My Daddy

I found a little book Maddie had written Rob and I had to share.

I Love My Daddy. By Maddie Billingsley


Ive loved you since I was a baby. I even love you now. You are a good daddy. I am so glad God made you my daddy. Thank you for working hard for us. I hope you are feeling ok. I love your deep lafe. I love how you take your time on things. I love your smile and your eyes. I hope you like your new job. I love you well because you are the best dad. Eneways  I love you.

The photos were taken by Cutie Pie Photography at the Daddy/Daughter Dance.

 
Isn't she a sweetie?

More fun in the Mud

Do you see a common theme here?

Happy St.Patrick's Day!

Today we had one of those parties that ended a little different than we expected! 

 Happy St.Patrick's Day!

I wanna go to the Daddy Daughter Dance

Sterling's Annual Daddy Daughter Dance is once again upon us.  Spirits rise when we receive the pretty little invitation in the mail.  Maddie marks the special day on her calendar and the countdown begins.

We have to go shopping for the perfect dress.  This year she wanted something white, sparkly, and one that twirls when she spins.

We finally found a winner!

Rob chose a sweet pink corsage for Maddie to wear to the dance.

The day finally arrived and Maddie was all smiles.  She and her daddy looked stunning as they headed to the Casa Blanca for the special festivities.

However, not everyone was happy.  Kinley was especially unhappy when shopping for Maddie's special dress.   She was soon pacified when we found her a pair of sparkly flip flops instead.  She is also already relishing in the fact that next year she will get to go to the dance as a Sterling kindergarten student.

But Mr. Cade still wasn't happy.  He had several plans of action. 

First, he decided to have his own Daddy Daughter Dance. Here he is with his daughter "Brittany" ready to party.

He was too cute swaying to the music, dancing with his "daughter".

He soon decided that wasn't much fun so his next plan.....

Meet our new daughter, Jessica. She is dressed and ready for the dance. 

(I have a feeling he will not appreciate this when he is older.)

We spent the evening wondering what Daddy and Maddie were doing now. I can't say I blame Caden for his trying because... I wanna go to the daddy daughter dance too!  Maybe next year, I could dress as "Jessica's dad" and we could both slip into the dance.  Hmmm.  it could work.  

Or maybe we will plan our own Mommy/Son Dance instead.

Just call me Dora

The highlight of my week:

Caden: " I love you Mommy."

Me: " I love you too Caden."

Caden: " You are my best friend. You are

my Dora and I am your Boots."

Me: The happiest mom on earth

Sunday Naps

Sunday Afternoons are sacred in the Billingsley household.

All of the kids know that it is the one day that Mommy and Daddy are taking a nap.  After church, we have lunch, and then we shut everything down for the afternoon.  Everyone is expected to lay down and rest.
Yesterday, was no exception.  However, during our nap, Rob and I received a special note under our door.

Check out the back of the note:

Hmmm..  maybe I shouldn't haven't been so eager to teach Maddie to read and writ.

The Unexpected

I love that our God is a God of Unexpected Surprises!  We got to experience that first hand this week.  On Sunday, we were wearing flip flops and enjoying the 70 degree weather. I was thinking about pulling out some of our summer clothes. By Tuesday, we had four inches of snow on our ground. 

  I love that everyone in Austin was forced to stop and stay at home with our families.  All of our big plans for the day, all the things that seemed so pressing and important were cancelled.  I love a "forced" day of rest or in this case a forced day of fun.  

We enjoyed a good day of making snow angels,

building a snowman for the first time,

                      watching Annie chase snowflakes,

  drinking lots of hot chocolate and reading The Snowy Day for the 50th time. 

In the words of my sweet Kinley," This was a good day."

Thank you God for yet another unexpected gift.